As parents, we love to praise our children when they do something well. But are there ways of praising that are wiser than others? Carol Dweck of the Scientific American contends that extolling hard work is better for children than praising their intelligence because hard work has a significant impact on both intelligence and achievement.
The logic is pretty simple: If, when your child succeeds you tell her that she is smart, she gets the message that "intelligence" is a static trait that influences her success. So when she encounters something in which she doesn't succeed, there comes the inevitable question: "Why didn't I succeed?" It is quite understandable that she might answer, "Until now everything was easy because I was smart. I must have found something that is beyond my reach." If, on the other hand you praise the hard work of your successful child, he hears that hard work and achievement go together. So when he encounters something in which he fails, it is a more natural posture for him to ask, "How is another way that I can attack this problem?"
Dweck's research supports that logic. She found that in various environments with diverse student populations that students who were told they were smart were more likely to give up when they encountered challenges than their peers who were told that their success was the result of hard work. Not suprisingly, those who kept working at the problems developed further mastery and confidence that led them to greater acheivement. Consequently the achievement gap between the "smart" and the "hard workers" widened as time went on.
Where the story gets interesting is how beliefs about fixed intelligence versus a mastery orietation impact the brain itself:
The helpless ones believe that intelligence is a fixed trait: you have only a certain amount, and that’s that. I call this a “fixed mind-set.” Mistakes crack their self-confidence because they attribute errors to a lack of ability, which they feel powerless to change. They avoid challenges because challenges make mistakes more likely and looking smart less so. . . The mastery-oriented children, on the other hand, think intelligence is malleable and can be developed through education and hard work. They want to learn above all else. After all, if you believe that you can expand your intellectual skills, you want to do just that.
The author participated in a study that taught a group of junior high students about how effort affects brain development as an intervention to encourage hard work.
They were taught that the brain is like a muscle that gets stronger with use and that learning prompts neurons in the brain to grow new connections. From such instruction, many students began to see themselves as agents of their own brain development. Students who had been disruptive or bored sat still and took note. One particularly unruly boy looked up during the discussion and said, “You mean I don’t have to be dumb?”
That is precisely the point. Intelligence, though in some measure innate, is malleable, and is shaped by the perseverance and attitude children show in learning. Parents, in turn, play a critical role by telling stories that highlight the importance of hard work, praising their children for perseverance, and modeling persistent problem solving. After all, if they can influence their intelligence, can't you too?
